It’s coming. Actually, it’s here already. The woke holiday season starts off with the White Colonial Gluttonous Genocide known to normal people as “Thanksgiving”.

But if you’ve been around a couple of years this is the season when the Hot Take websites trot out their favorite insights. As predictable as hearing Bing Crosby crooning White Christmas at the Best Buy, the woke writers offer up the same insights which every 17 year old discovers and thinks he’s the first kid in the History of Mankind to figure out. We used to laugh and shake our heads. That was until roughly 2008 – with the explosion of Brooklyn-based “journalists” all looking for the take that would piss off mom and dad and Middle America. Gawker, Jezebel, Salon, Slate, Vox, Vice, The Verge and at least another dozen that have come and gone since then made up the stable of click-bait journalism.

For example

Whelp, for the first time in history, your friends a The Loftus Party are celebrating these Holiday Hot Takes with our exclusive Advent Calendar – for free!

Drop in every day to open another door into the wonderful, wacky and woke celebration of Winter Wonderland.

Here’s a sample. Check back every day until December 25 for a new reveal!