Today is the day. It’s the shortest day of the year, or as the more learned people call it, “The Winter Solstice”. So, hang in there everyone. The days start getting longer tomorrow. That’s legit good news for everyone like me who is hanging on by a darkness induced emotional thread. Damn. These days when the sun goes down at what feels like lunch time are just the worst. I guess the name for it is Seasonal Affective Disorder or SAD… get it? Huh? Whatever. All I know is it sucks. For real. To all the people in Nordic countries who deal with months of darkness, God bless ya. You are some tough mofos. Drink and screw all ya want. Whatever get through. For me, it’s hanging on til today. The winter solstice. The thought of being through the worst of it always helps.

But what else can we do? All the people who just despise this crap? Here’s a couple ideas: Stop turning the clocks back every winter. Fucking stop. When we ‘Spring forward’ this year, just leave it. Stop fucking with the clocks. Yes. I know it’s about the tilt of the Earth and rotating around the Sun, but guess what? Turning back the clocks and hour makes it worse. So, stop. Next? Hit a tanning bed. Take off those clothes and bake that bod. That’s the plan for yours truly. I’m headed to a dermatologist to get the go ahead. Let’s make sure we’re not getting any funky moles or pre-cancerous weirdness and then blast our bods with the power of the sun. If you wanna tan? Do it. If you just want to get blasted with some UV light? Do that too. Either way. It’s all good. Keeps you sane. We just got a couple more months of this bullshit. Congrats. We made it to the Winter Solstice. It gets easier from here.